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I wish
being a lesbian were like
being left-handed.

Whenever someone notices
you writing a cheque
or doodling
or opening a door
And they exclaim:
"You're left-handed?"
I wish it were as simple as that.

When it's funny
and I laugh, panicking.
Such stuff punchlines are made on,
that such a casual,
integral,
part of myself
has the spotlight shone on it,
And revealed (they think)
their own ignorance,
(How wonderful it is to enlighten someone
by being.)

And yet I never hear the questions
that logically spring to mind:
"Won't you have trouble with the gearshift
on a car?"
"How do you use scissors?"
"Can you even write
with your right hand?"

I wish all comparisons
and metaphors
were true.
Also posted at my LJ (now inactive).

(1/2/2013) Hey everyone! Thank you so much for the Daily Deviation. I wrote this several years ago, when I thought coming out was the greatest, most world-changing thing I could do for myself. Now I know that coming out of the closet isn't the end of a journey; it's not absolute. At the time I wrote this, I was out to my close friends, and a couple of classes and teachers at my high school.

Being "in the closet" is not a sign of cowardice. And if you are in an LGBTQ community or have LGBTQ friends who are out, you don't have to come out until you feel safe. You don't owe the homophobes of the world anything. Come out on your own terms, the way you want to!
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-02-01
Right Hand, Left Hand is a simple metaphor from ~mtroubadour ( Featured by Nichrysalis )
:iconhopeburnsblue:
hopeburnsblue Featured By Owner Dec 16, 2014  Professional Writer
What an interesting thought!
Reply
:icongymnastixjenny:
GymnastixJenny Featured By Owner May 25, 2013
I'm straight and right-handed but I can still see the beauty and care put into this piece.
Excellent work!
Reply
:iconparadigmfallen:
ParadigmFallen Featured By Owner Mar 17, 2013  Professional Artist
Well written, well thought out, well done.

I wish things were simpler for people who are L/G/B/T/Q -- it really shouldn't be so complicated. It really should be as simple as being left handed.
Reply
:iconempty-lungs:
empty-lungs Featured By Owner Feb 4, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
that such a casual,
integral,
part of myself
has the spotlight shone on it,
And revealed (they think)
their own ignorance,
(How wonderful it is to enlighten someone
by being.)

this part right here is such a perfect, intelligent comment. i just read that back and it sounds really patronising. i don't mean for it, because the thing about sexuality is that you can't be defined by it, and that seems like such an obvious thing, but the way you phrased it was very intelligent. this is really perfect, so well done :)
Reply
:iconsaints-fan-12:
saints-fan-12 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Frankly, I don't care what your sexual orientation is, as long as you and your partner are happy. But of course my religion would go against it, seeing it as a sin.
Reply
:iconloveless-yokai:
Loveless-Yokai Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
Well I'm asexual but I like both guys and girls.It's hard.I haven't come out fully and when I try others just shut it down and say 'no your not' or something equally silly.
Those that have listened to what I've said think I'm a lesbian I mean seriously there's not just gay, straight and lesbian there are those in between.
I liked this.It made sense and got the point across.It doesn't white wash anything and that's what adds to it.Keep it up.
Reply
:iconlovelydeath97:
LovelyDeath97 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013   Artist
I'm bisexual. But I always get upset whenever people say, "So you're a lesbian?"
It gets under my skin because It almost feels stereotypical.
Just because you like some girls means your a lesbian?
Just because you're bisexual means you have to like every girl you see?
I really love this poem because it's so true and straight to the point.
You're not bullshitting or sugar coating anything.
Good job and keep it up.
:)
Reply
:iconoppafrerardstyle:
oppafrerardstyle Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student
I am bisexual as well and I couldn't agree more. I also find it extremely rude when people feel the need to question you about it in public around strangers. It makes me so uncomfortable. People seriously need to know their boundaries because not being heterosexual isn't that much of a big deal and too many people act like it is.
Reply
:iconmtroubadour:
mtroubadour Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
Yeah, that sucks. It's absolutely presumptuous. It feels like bisexual people get crap from both straight and gay people.

I'm glad my poem felt true to you. :)
Reply
:iconrayzaz:
Rayzaz Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
I'm lesbian, I wish that every one would see it as a girl having a friend that was a guy or something just because I am doesn't mean I like you like that I love my lover like that *sigh* it's not fair at all
Reply
:iconnat-tama:
nat-tama Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student Digital Artist
I really appreciate this.
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013   Writer
I think this is so true. Strangely I'm ambidextrous and Pansexual... Hmm...
Reply
:iconbakuspirit:
BakuSpirit Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist
Reply
:iconshadowisstillalive:
ShadowIsStillAlive Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Though I'm not positive of my sexual orientation, I know that this touches my heart deeply. It's very nice, and I wish people would react like this too.
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yeah, when i told people i was bi i lost all but 3 friends, i wasn't popular at first but it hurt that just because i'm 'different' or 'not normal' I have to be hated. They are SCAREd i like THEM.
Just because i'm bisexual, or a lesbian [more on the lesbian side >>] Doesn't mean i like you, if they were a true friend, they wouldn't give a f*ck.

I know how you feel.
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013   Writer
I'll be your friend if you need one :)

And it's kinda stupid that people just assume being different is a bad thing. Sure if you were a psychotic killer I could understand losing friends, but just for being Heterocurious? (A word I use for people who are mostly gay but not fully) I mean you only like girls, you won't (like Twilight) break into their houses just to watch them sleep or something.
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
thanks :]

Yeah, but i'm more pansexual [friend just told me what it meant and i feel stupid...]
But i hate people who are like that.
[link]
this is long FYI but it explains better.
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013   Writer
(I'm pansexual too but I'm more attracted to guys... And hey, at least you know now)

I may not have gone through exactly what you've gone through but I know the feeling. Because I'm pretty feminine for a guy and I used to keep my hair pretty long (it's sort of a custom in my culture, long story) I've had a few guys try to beat me up for being different - girls too. (What they didn't know is I've taken self defence classes) But I know that emotional pain hurts worse than phisical pain (within reason)
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
[Same except for me i'm more attracted to girls]

Yeah, I'm like a tom-boy kind of girl who really is super shy >< i have some of my hair cover my face so people think i'm emo, but i actually am really happy some times and the way i part my hair it ends up covering some of my face. People bully me a lot too because i'm not straight. But I have taken martial arts classes [and MANY of them] so no one can come at me and hurt me.

I'm happy that you know how i feel because at least i'm not alone :]
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013   Writer
(Well you know - it's the whole I'm a guy, you're a girl, we're both attracted to the same gender, thing lol)

I'm shy too... And my hair covers my face too... Strange

'Course you're not alone - there's so many people out there who feel the same but I know what you mean C:
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
[Lol xD]

Yeah...strange...? e.e''

Yeah, and if we are we have each other :]
Reply
:iconstrudel--cutie4427:
Strudel--Cutie4427 Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2013   Writer
We could just be twins lol

That's true :)

(MLP Avatar I see. :))
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icondalunawiz:
dalunawiz Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
hmm yeah. I never told my friends i'm bi, or really pansexual for me, they just sort of found out and it was okay.
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I was left with no one. But my 4 friends were okay with it. While my other friends were scared i would like them. And avoided me.
I felt like just because i'm lesbian doesn't mean i like them. Doesn't mean i will EVER like them. just means i like girls. they need to think things through and not jump to conclusions.
It gets really frustrating.
Reply
:icondalunawiz:
dalunawiz Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
yeah, strait people dont like ALL boys/ girls, so why would lesbians?
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
yeah exactly! I hate people who think that lesbians LOVE all girls, and if you tell someone personally, then you TRUST them, not LIKE them.
People seriously need logic.
Reply
:icondalunawiz:
dalunawiz Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
yeah. they'll get used to it eventually, society i mean, i hope.
Reply
:iconjellybray:
JellyBray Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
yeah. hope and pray.
Reply
:icondalunawiz:
dalunawiz Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Student General Artist
yep
Reply
:iconkamyriona:
Kamyriona Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
This is excellent.
Reply
:icongnomesandunicorns:
gnomesandunicorns Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
i loved it! and just a quick note the LGBTQ day of silence is on april 19th.
Reply
:iconhermione771:
Hermione771 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for writing this! I'm lesbian, and I totally agree with the message. There's a quote out there that I love:
"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand."
We can't change ourselves, but we can change our attitude and help others change theirs. We have to do the best with what we have, and if someone feels they can't come out then they shouldn't just sit there, they should do their best to change the situation.
Love is love is love~
Reply
:iconizzy-chan13:
IZZY-CHAN13 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
... Ignorance spares no one.
Reply
:icontokyo18zelda:
tokyo18zelda Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
This is really talented work! I hate it when people freak out because I say I'm bisexual. Nice job.
Reply
:iconkilama:
Kilama Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
I think what you said, even in the description "you don't have to come out until you feel safe.", totally goes along with this. You don't go around telling people, 'hey, I'm left handed'. It's not something you try to hide, but it's not something you announce either. Why should you have to? So you're left handed, and so what? So you're LGBTQ, so what?
Reply
:iconmtroubadour:
mtroubadour Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
Thank you. :)

One difference, unfortunately, is that left-handed people do not have increased levels of bullying, suicides, depression, and drug/alcohol abuse. Unlike LGBTQ youth on average. So the "so what" could be "so give extra love and support for these difficulties".
Reply
:iconkilama:
Kilama Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
Right, right. My point was, that's how it /should/ be. I mean, it should be as big a deal as finding out someone is left handed. As in, not a big deal at all. I know society isn't there yet, unfortunately.
Reply
:iconnever-look-back-once:
Never-Look-Back-Once Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Love should not be judged because of sex. Love can not be controlled or contain to a specific set of rules and ideas. Love is not an impulse that you feel then it goes away. If someone loves another of the same sex why is it different than loving someone of a different sex. I have never understood the thought processes of those who hate those who are different though I grew up in an homophobic home. Still my closest friend is a lesbian who trusted me with her secret before anyone else even her own family. I'm straight but I view love as a fire. Once given a chance it will burn on its fuel whatever it may be.
Reply
:iconlonewintress:
LoneWintress Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Tell this to my mom pls.

Exactly, it's just there's 2 boys/girls instead of 1 boy/girl. o-o Nothing's different. I really don't understand homophobics and probably never will..

I'm a girl. My mom says I act like a boy. She thinks I'm gay. -_-
Reply
:iconnever-look-back-once:
Never-Look-Back-Once Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
The year my friend came out was the year my Mum & Dad died in a car crash. She was one of the few that kept me from losing myself. For that I did everything I could to learn and except what my friend was. I even started a club at my high school at the time to help gay and lesbian students teach homophobic a to except one another.
Reply
:iconpoetries:
poetries Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013
That is really sweet of you. I'm sorry for your parents' passing. :hug: :heart:
Reply
:iconnever-look-back-once:
Never-Look-Back-Once Featured By Owner Feb 2, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks.
Reply
:iconlonewintress:
LoneWintress Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Wow, i'm sorry :C

I really don't know what to say lmfao.
Reply
:iconnever-look-back-once:
Never-Look-Back-Once Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
It's okay. Life moves on.
Reply
:iconm3l1:
M3l1 Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
Well, maybe someday :) I mean, in the past, being a left handed was bad as devil, teachers used to tie the left hand of the left-handed kids to change their habits and now, its something interesting and special :D
Reply
:iconfallenface:
Fallenface Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
My few friends at school consider themselves to be better than me because I'm left handed and friends with a lesbian. They think I will die before them because I am left handed.
Reply
:iconerrantcrow:
ErrantCrow Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013  Professional Artist
I got that too growing up. I researched, and this is the stupid truth. This was for factory workers when most jobs were blue collar. They make machines with buzzsaws adjustable for lefties now, so the statistic isn't even true anymore. Tell them they're being duped by out of date info and you have no plans to get into a career that requires blades of death.

Oh, and you're also more statistically likely to become the American President. A much higher percentage of American Presidents were lefties than the percentage of lefties vs. righties alive in America.


Unfortunately, I have no handy positive factoids for the lesbian half of this...we'll just have to create them in our lifetimes.
Reply
:iconfallenface:
Fallenface Featured By Owner Feb 1, 2013
You, sir\ma'am, are some form of genius. I will never be able to measure up to your form of intellange. (Seriously, you sound like my genius uncle.)
Reply
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